Michael Rothenberg / Poems
JUNE
Morning belonged to the recollection of dreams
but I had none, only vacant contemplationwaiting for some train to pass that is no more
Thursday. Picking it out from the rest. There goesone day I thought would last forever. Now
hope springs eternally dragging mopey headedflowers past a velvet and cerulean peak into decay
swamping dead eyes in slow silent wavetops of summer*
yellow sunfilled roses
wet lilacs invisiblein wordworn space conjuring
fragrance from memorytwo dancers in ocean breeze
running crest to crestimminent, rugged, bloodied
pursue fugitive echo of soul*
angel at forge
inside heart of gargantua
beast ever turning toward
fate but angels continue
harping muses ring in shine
of heavenly bodies twinkling
in space
as he has abducted her psyche
somewhere behind
monolithic chatter of crickets low
rumble of death, as we become
smaller and less distinct we hear
the child in ourselves
night seals our lips
*I used to only write indoors
a universe of poetry
inside my head
then a writer I admire suggested
I go outside where
I first wrote:
big blue sky
then crossed it out
who gives a
shit if the sky is big
or blue? but still outside
under big blue
sky things were going on
nature happening
kinds of clouds
streaked
billowy climbing, wispy
cirrus behind nimbus, one
especially aggressive
cloud
slapped me in the eye-
then observed, recorded
clouds as portents, poems
ways to bring
inner and outer worlds out
from there
wrote in casinos
parties, massage parlors
online chat rooms, museums
so when time came
to take it
down, inside or out
Id really be in shape*
sons 6th birthday party
hang balloonswrap tv set box with bows
I want it all, I want it alland I want it now!"
shiny blue wrapping papervideo-
candle on chocolate cakefrosting, chocolate dinosaur
sing Happy Birthday"we will, we will rock you!"
then video arcade wherehe wins day-glo frisbee
blows up tanks, eats French fries*
I know two women, I like them both, that seems wrong
someone always gets hurt
that may be true, but you need time to know them both
but sleep with them both?
I know two men I am crazy about. One is very special
in one way, his way, and the other in his. But both
very, very different. I dont even know myself well enough
to tell one goodbye, I want to experience both in every way
Don't they want to possess you?
Don't you want to be possessed?
the one most right will be the strongest and survive
I dont want to be possessed right now. Ive been
possessed for years. I want my freedom
I feel Ive had freedom but want to land, somewhere peaceful to sleep
suppose you give one up and it turns out to be the one
you should have kept. you need to experience
both and find yourself along the way
I agree otherwise the decision would be arbitrary
my two guys both want to own me. they talk
of marriage when I am just getting out of one
Like tossing a coin
right. Unfair to both, but mostly to yourself
Are you leading them on to indulge yourself?
Im not leading anyone on, I just dont make promises
Im not prepared to keep. Both know Im dating the other
neither needs to know if I sleep with the other. That's
my business. I dont kiss and tell, but sex with one might
be awesome and horrible with the other. Suppose you
really like one and the sex sucked? What would you do?
Punt*
I had a dream
I was at ezra pound's house the night he diedhe left me his stereo
I had to sneak it out when no one was lookinghe left no written will
and I was afraid people would think I stole itI had a hell of a time
trying to disconnect the speaker wires . . .*
i had a gold ring
i lost itten years later
found it in closetput it in a safe so
i wouldn't lose itsix years later someone
broke into the safestole it
now ive lostan important paper
i want to find ithow could i lose it?
What happens to memories?
*
you can't pick up
where you left off
what can you do?
get lost
garble, squawk, hiss
listen for new voice.
wow, did ya see that steel-blue wing fly by?
don't slouch, scrunch your shoulders like that, don't slump
oh, my aching back! try later*
waking in bathtub of ice
with one less kidney
than I was born withthat will teach ya to drink with strangers
*
so here we are face to cyberspace
Queen blasting walls. heaven
can wait. having a hell of a time
how about a little wire
runs up my spine down yours
you tap my brain. I feel your heartbeat
not fast enough, the exchange
want to go faster, mail takes too long
Miami few thousand miles away
pool under clacking palms
Biscayne Bay ruffled in primordial
alligator atmosphere 90 degrees
I make a practice objectifying women
its not my fault they can't deal with it . . ."all I can do is surrender to the moment, just surrender"
lamplight on jack-in-the-box Shakespeare
(see ya!)*
oh my
what is this
flowerbehind your ear
this
fragrance
come a little nearerwill you?
*
d. in cutoff shorts mowing
summer grass'neath rainbow
of men's
under-shorts*
in high grass of summer
lost my cherryso long ago
side effect of divorce
seems to be growing backcheck this
out
little red pulsing budwhat could it be?
*
I ain't got no body" by S. and Ghostly Confession
invisible presence sweeping up laurelsto wear upon cyberskulls. Its a thankless job
take these roses, imagine the fragranceas spirit of wilting petals carpet bottomless ground
but let me say this, youre sweet to placatewith transcendent admiration. a love that will never
go down in history.*
did I ever say why Im harried?
priests
don't need to be married
bodiless we serve
a compliment
to bond
established overyears
and you
dear need notcomplicate
vows of camaraderie
with contracts or transactions
just credit whereits due
have I made myself clear?6/6- 6/27/97